When I began in this world, over ten years ago now, I really dove in. Not deeply, necessarily, but with broad interest that covered anything remotely sexual. Most of what I thought of when I imagined kink didn’t appeal to me. Giving up control, being struck with objects or hands, being tied… But I did find it fascinating. And I met people who did like it. I learned about what they liked and wanted and found pleasure or safety in. I watched, with excited fascination, a lot of people doing a lot of things to a lot of other people that I didn’t at all want done to me.
Over time, I gathered knowledge. Bits and bobs here and there, accumulating in the corners of my mind at the same time toys accumulated in drawers, whims and requests and gifts relegated to storage. I didn’t use them much. One or two favorites saw the light of day, but the rest sat, organized and gathering dust.
Until now.
I have been asked before, more than once, whether I would offer sensual domination. I’ve always demurred. Between the genuine risk of injury, my own lack of training, and my aversion to pain or discomfort, I’ve never been sure I could do a good job. But I’ve been feeling stagnant of late, looking to add to my repertoire, so this time, when a trusted friend made a gentle inquiry, I said what the hell and went for it.
Turns out I’m kind of into it.
I spent my early FBSM years learning it. First in official, actual massage school to learn how to do it properly, then in constant practice to get good at it. My style evolved as I mastered first one skill set, then another, and another. Now I get to master another still!
I’m opting out of the formal education route this time. Several years ago, I spoke seriously to a bondassage instructor to have them fly to Seattle and spend a weekend instructing myself and a friend. Ultimately, the price tag put me off it, but it wasn’t just that. Bondassage is a trademarked protocol and, while it comes with certification and certainty, it’s also confining. It’s someone else’s way of doing things, which is fine and lovely and not really for me.
Instead, I am experimenting. I cut a hole in my old massage table and played around with it. I LOVE having a milking table, but I didn’t find them ready made to order from anywhere I trusted, and my hack job, while functional, doesn’t meet my standards. I hope to get something custom designed in the future, but for now, it will make the occasional appearance.
Other long forgotten toys have come out of the closet. A series of insertables, some vibrating friends, things that prickle and tickle and sting… For someone who finds sensations of interest, a collection of items that deliver such a variety of them is of interest indeed.
Since that first “fuck it, why not” I have entertained a small cadre of familiar gentleman callers. Some were expected, others a surprise. I’ve learned from everyone, and some have learned a thing or two from me.
Because I come from a sensual massage background instead of a BDSM background, my personal style is still very sensation oriented versus domination oriented. I don’t ask for special titles, and I am not inclined to humiliate my darlings. I don’t dress any differently than I usually do; no spiked heels or latex for me. I default to my hands and my teeth as my primary tools, and we will almost certainly reach my limits before we reach yours. For now.
For those seeking a little spice in their massages, I will be a good fit. For those who wish to do a little experimenting, you are welcome here. And for the adventurous folks who can’t get enough, I have a few friends who would be very happy to join us. They’d like to remain anonymous to the general public so for the purposes of this post they are known as the sprite, with an impish spirit and a boisterous laugh, the goddess, firm but kind, and the demon, harmless to the flesh but evil to the mind. Each of my special friends brings their own flavor to the session: like trying a different dish from the same restaurant. The curious are welcome to reach out with questions.
If you’ve been curious, but shy to take part, I encourage you to try me. I’m not going to spit on you, or degrade you, I won’t call you names or leave mysterious bruises anywhere. For that there are many more capable and willing than I. All we will do is explore a little, see what works and what doesn’t, and maybe open some doors you didn’t know you had.
Or maybe some of mine 😉